War on Christmas

When I was a kid in Japan (the child of a diplomat) the Canadian embassy invited the American kids over for a holiday party. Santa came and it was the first time I’d seen a real Santa up close. His beard looked real. He was in a quality red suit. This was Santa. And Santa was probably Canadian because it’s cold up there so this was real. Santa winked. He ho-ho’d like it was real and I was meeting Santa.

He leaned in close. Then he gave “Meakin” a girl’s present, a cheap and stupid doll. I cried on the little stage in front of everyone and I cried all the way home, vowing to never forgive Santa. I threw the doll onto the Tokyo subway tracks.

So fire truck kid, I see you. That truck was nice, but there you were on Sixth Avenue and it was Christmas Eve and that truck just wasn’t right. Fuck Santa and his bad presents.

About Meakin Armstrong

Fiction writer, fiction editor, journalist, and copywriter.
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